Hi, my name is Jana, and I’m an Ivolover. My obsession started about 3 years ago or so, and like many obsessions, it started out slow. But along the way, I had to find a friend or two to help feed my obsession and help it grow. It started with just watching them on PBS, with a concert or two. Then, I went to the concert. After that one concert, it became apparent that this obsession turned into an addiction! I just had to have them – their faces, their music, their voices, the sound, it filled my soul like no other euphoric thing I’d ever experienced! I became a fanatic, ordering every CD I could find and scouring You Tube each night for a video or interview, so I could experience this amazing phenomenon. I got my fill most nights, but I just had to have more. I started listening to them all day at work, playing the same CD over and over. The bad thing was, I became a pusher! Yes, every time someone came to my desk and asked what I was listening to, I couldn’t wait to start pushing my addiction on to them. And it was so easy, too. Just showed them the CD cover and told them how awesome they were. Then I brought in the DVDs for them to watch. I was so bad…. Pushing my addiction on others like that. When we thought we couldn’t possibly get more of them, it becomes our ring tones on our cell phones, and their pictures are our wallpapers on our phones and computers, and to really annoy those that aren’t our fellow Ilvolovers, we have their songs on our ringback tones on our phones! There we were, exposing innocent persons to just a snippet of their voices, every time they called us! I just had to stop, but I couldn’t. Then, I found what I thought was a support group. We met and shared our stories about our addiction, and they were all so similar. Kindred spirits! I’d also found this blog site, where I found more addicted and obsessed persons! This obsession was rampant, and I quickly found it was spreading like wildfire all around the world. The scary thing was that no one tried to stop it! We just kept adding more people to our group. Like all addictions, it was getting a bit expensive, too! We just had to have their latest CD or DVD and we had to have it now. We could not wait and thought nothing of paying expedited shipping costs, just so we could have it first! We went to concerts and fought to get front row seats. We did not care what they cost, it was “the guys!” Then there were the meet & greets. Were we afraid of overdosing? No, never! We knew our friends were there to help us. The cost of the meet & greets and concerts? Hundreds…to some, maybe even thousands! It didn’t matter. We were there. Even when we’d thought we’d had enough, we just kept needing more to feed this habit of ours. We kept pushing others, so they would share in our glorious addiction; this untold high we got when we heard our favorite guy sing “that” note! It was pure ecstasy for those precious seconds! The cost of those meet & greets become a distant past when you see their faces up close and personal. Oh, and it doesn’t stop there….all of a sudden, we find out there is a concert in Italy! The next thing we know we are buying a ticket to Florence or Verona and then we are afraid. Afraid to tell our loved ones we are going to see the guys, yet again – that part is not so bad, but we are afraid to tell them it’s in Italy (because we are sure they will be calling the men in the little white coats!)! What a joy it will be to hear them in their own country. We’ve yet to experience the joy and beauty of our own country, but don’t think twice about jetting off to Italy! They don’t know it, but for those 30 seconds or less when you are looking into those innocent and talented eyes, they are yours! They belong to you. When you hold their hands, the power of your touch, matches theirs and it’s electric. The fire courses through your veins, their eyes penetrate yours and you are lost in those few seconds; you get dizzy, and lightheaded. You cannot speak; your legs feel like fettuccine, and your feet like cement blocks. You are rudely brought back to reality when they say to turn around and smile, and snap! You turn around one last time. You look at them and the moment is gone.
Many say, after one, or even two meet & greets, and the money it cost; that’s it, no more, won’t do it again. Won’t spend all that money on a ticket, or to get first, their latest CD…they are done. They are calling it quits. They try to be strong, but peer pressure is overwhelming. The date of their next concert is drawing near. Ok, you decide, you will go – just to keep your friends company. Well, maybe you’ll try to get good seats, but definitely no meet & greet. The time is getting closer and closer…you start to feel it again, as hard as you try to push it way, it overtakes your very being again. All of a sudden, you realize, your addiction is back. It’s this craving, this thing, it’s just so overpowering; you can’t stop it. You buy the ticket, you check your bank account, it’s nearly overdrawn, you buy the meet & greet!
No, no, you said you wouldn’t get caught up in this thing again. It’s not worth all the money, and the waiting, and anticipation. It’s too much stress! But, like the words in Unchained Melody, it’s a hunger; a hungering, for their touch. A need, only they can fill.
So, is it worth it you ask?